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and a faddle, a fack and a prike, for to convey
the faid bacon and corn a journey out of the 6 county of Stafford, at his coftages. And then the faid bailiff thall, with the faid freeholders, 'fummon all the tenants of the faid manor, to be 6 ready at the day appointed at Whichenovre, for
to do and perform the fervices which they owe
to the bacon. And at the day affigned, all fuch No 608. MONDAY, OCTOBER 18.
6. as owe fervices to the bacon, fhall be ready at the gate of the manor of Whichenovre, from the fun-rifing to moon, attending and awaiting for the coming of him who fetcheth the bacon. And when he is come, there shall be deliver"ed to him and his fellows, chapelets; and to all thofe which shall be there, to do their 'fervices due to the bacon. And they fhall "lead the faid demandant with trumps and tabours, and other manner of minftrelfy to the 'hall-door, where he thall find the lord of Whiche novre, or his fteward ready to deliver the bacon in this manner.
fhall conduct him to be paffed the lordship of Whichenovre, And then thall they all return except him, to whom appertaineth to make the earriage and journey without the county of Staf ford, at the costs of his lord of Whichenovre.'
And his neighbours fhall make oath, that they truft verily he hath faid truly. And if it be found by his neighbours before named, that he be a freeman, there fhall be delivered to him half a quarter of wheat and a cheese; and if he be a villain, he thall have half a quarter of rye without cheefe. And then thall Knightleye, the lord of Ludlow, be called for, to carry all thefe things tofore rehearsed; and the faid corn 'fhall be laid on one horfe and the bacon above it: and he to whom the bacon appertaineth fhall afcend upon his horfe, and fhall take the cheese before him if he have a horfe. And if he have the Lord of Wichenovre fhall caufe him. none, to have one horfe and faddle, to fuch time as he be paffed his lordship and fo fhall they de· .part the manor of Whichenovre with the coin and the bacon, tofore him that hath won it, with trumpets, tabourets, and other manner of minftrelly. And all the free tenants of Whichenovre,
• Mr. Spectator,
CCORDING to my promife I herewith tranfmit to you a lift of feveral perfons, who from time to time demanded the flitch of bacon of Sir Philip de Somervile, and his defcendants; as it is preferved in an ancient manufcript under the title of "the register of "Whichenovre-hall, and of the bacon flitch there
< He shall enquire of him which demandeth the <bacon, if he have brought twain of his neigh-maintained." bours with him: which must answer, "they be here ready." And then the fteward fhall cause these two neighbours to fwear, if the faid demandant be a wedded man, or have been a man wedded; and if fince his marriage one year and a day be paft; and if he be a freeman or a villain. And if his neighbours make oath, that he hath for him all these three points rehearsed; then fhall the bacon be taken down and brought to the hall-door, and fhall there be laid upon one half quarter of wheat, and upon one other of rye. And he that demandeth the bacon fhall ⚫ kneel upon his knee, and thall hold his right hand upon a book, which book thall be laid upon the bacon and the corn, and thall make oath in this manner.
Perjuria ridet amanium.
Ovid. Ars Am. 1. 1. ver. 633. -Forgiving with a smile
"Hear ye, Sir Philip de Somervile, lord of "Whichenovre, mayntener and gyver of this ba"conne: that I A fithe I wedded B my wife, and" "fithe I had hyr in my kepying, and at my wylle, "by a year and a day after our marriage, I would "not have chaunged for none other; farer, ne "fowler; richer, ne pourer; ne for none other
defcended of greater lineage; flepying newaking, "at noo tyme. And if the feyd B were fole, and "I fole, I would take her to be my wife before "all the wymen of the world, of what condi"ciones foever they be, good or evylle: as help "me God and his Seyntes, and this flesh and all "Alethes."
In the beginning of this record is recited the law or inftitution in form, as it is already printed in your last paper: to which are added two bylaws, as a comment upon the general law, the fubftance whereof is, that the wife fhall take the fame oath as the hufband, mutatis mutandis ; and the judges thall, as they think meet, inter rogate or cross examine the witnesses. After this proceeds the register in manner following, "Aubry de Falstaff, fon of Sir John Falstaff, "kt. with dame Maude his wife, were the first "that demanded the bacon, he having bribed ❝ twain of his father's companions to swear falily "in his behoof, whereby he gained the flitch, "but he and his faid wife falling immediately into
a difpute how the faid bacon fhould be dreffed, it was by order of the judges taken from him and hung up again in the hall. "Alifon the wife of Stephen Freckle, brought "her faid hufband along with her, and fet forth "the good conditions and behaviour of her con"fort, adding withal that fhe doubted not but "he was ready to atteft the like of her, his wife; "whereupon he, the faid, Stephen, thaking his
head, the turned thort upon him, and gave him
❝ a box on the ear.
Philip de Waverland, having laid his hand "upon the book, when the claufe, were I fole "and fhe fole, was rehearsed, found a fecret com"punction rifing in his mind, and stole it off
Richard de Lovelefs, who was a courtier, and a very well bred man, being obferved to "hefitate at the words after our marriage, was " thereupon required to explain himself. "plied, by talking very largely of his exact "complaifance while he was a lover; and alledged "that he had not in the leaft difobliged his wife "for a year and a day before marriage, which he "hoped was the fame thing.
"Joceline Jolly, Efq; making it appear by un"questionable teftimony, that he and his wife "had preferved full and entire affection for the "fpace of the first month, commonly called the "honey-moon; he had in confideration thereof "one rather beftowed upon him."
After this, fays the record, many years paffed
took all thofe gentlemen he faw in fcarfs to be perfons of that dignity; for that a young divine, after his first degree in the univerfity, ufually comes hither only to fhow himself; and, on that occafion, is apt to think he is but half " equipped with a gown and caffock for his public appearance, if he hath not the additional ornament of a scarf of the firft magnitude to intitle him to the appellation of Dr. from his landlady, and the boy at Child's. 'Now fince I know that this piece of garniture is looked upon as a mark of vanity or affectation, as it is made ufe of among fome of the little fpruce adventurers of the town, I should
glad if you would give it a place among thofe extravagancies you have justly exposed in feveral of your papers: being very well affured that the main body of the clergy both in the country and the universities, who were almost to a man untainted with it, would be very well pleafed to fee this venerable foppery well < expofed. When my patron did me the honour " to take me into his family (for 1 must own myfelf of this order) he was pleased to fay he 'took me as a friend and companion; and 'whether he looked upon the scarf Ike the lace and fhoulder-knot of a footman, as a badge of fervitude and dependence, I do not know, but "he was fo kind as to leave my wearing of it to my own difcretion; and not having any just title to it from my degrees, I am content to be "without the ornament. The privileges of our ( nobility to keep a certain number of chaplains are undifputed, though perhaps not one in ten ' of those reverend gentlemen have any relation to the noble families their fcarfs belong to; the right generally of creating all chaplains, except the domeftic, where there is one, being nothing more than the perquifite of a fteward's place, who if he happens to outlive any confiderable number of his noble mafters, thall probably, at one and the fame time, have fifty chaplains, all in their proper accoutrements, of his own creation; though, perhaps, there hath been neither grace nor prayer faid in the family fince the introduction of the first co
'I am, &c.'
• Mr. Spectator,
I find but two couples, in this first century, that were fuccefsful: the firft was a fea-captainand his wife, who fince the day of their marriage had not feen one another until the day of the claim. The fecond was an honeft pair in the neighbourhood; the hufband was a man of plain good fenfe, and a peaceable temper; the . woman was dumb.'
word or two concerning the ftrength of imagination. I can give you a lift upon the first notice, of a rational China cup, of an egg that walks upon two legs, and a quart-pot that fings like a nightingale. There is in my neigh'bourhood a very pretty prattling fhoulder of
veal, that fqualls out at the fight of a knife. Then, as for natural antipathies, I know a general officer who was never conquered but ¿ by a fmothered rabbit; and a wife that domi6 neers over her husband by the help of a breast A ftory that relates to myfelf on this fubject may be thought not unentertaining, 'efpecially when I affure you that it is literally I had long made love to a lady, in the < poffeffion of whom I am now the happiest of mankind, whofe hand I fhould have gained with much difficulty without the affiftance of • a cat. You must know then, that my moft dangerous rival had fo ftrong, an averfion to this fpecies, that he infallibly fwooned away
novre-hall; infomuch that one would have thought that the whole country were turned Jews, fo little was their affection to the flitch
❝ of bacon.
The next couple enrolled had like to have carried it, if one of the witneffes had not depofed, that dining on a Sunday with the demandant, whofe wife had fat below the fquire's lady at church, fhe the faid wife dropped fome expreffions, as if the thought her husband deferved to be knighted; to which he ⚫ returned a paffionate pish? the judges taking the premifes into confideration, declared the aforefaid behaviour to imply an unwarrantable ambition in the wife, and anger in thebe hufband.
It is likewife remarkable, that a couple were rejected upon the depofition of one of their neighbours, that the lady had once told her husband, that it was her duty to obey ;" to which he replied, "oh, my dear! you are "never in the wrong."
The violent paffion of one lady for her lapC dog; the turning away of the old houfe-maid by another; a tavern-bill torn by the wife, and a taylor's by the husband; a quarrel about the kiffing cruft; fpoiling of dinners, and coming in late of nights; are fo many feveral articles which occafioned the reprobation of fome scores of demandants, whofe names are recorded in the aforefaid regifter.
Without enumerating other particular perfons, I fhall content myself with obferving that the fentence pronounced against one Gervafe Poacher is, that he might have had bacon to his eggs, if he had not hitherto fcolded his wife when they were over-boiled." And the depofition against Dorothy Doolittle runs in thefe words, "that he had so far ufurped the dominion "of the coal fire, (the ftirring whereof her hufband claimed to himfelf) that by her good "will she never would fuffer the poker out of her hand."
It is recorded as a fufficient difqualification of a certain wife, that speaking of her husband, the faid God forgive him.
N° 609. WEDNESDAY, OCT. 20.
Farrago libelli. Juv. Sat. 1. ver. 86.
The mifcellaneous fubjects of my book. • Mr. Spectator,
Have for fome time defired to appear in your paper, and have therefore chofen a day to steal into the Spectator, when I take it for granted you will not have many fpare minutes for fpeculations of your own. As I was the other day walking with an honeft country gentleman, he very often was expreffing his aftonishment to fee the town fo mightily crouded with doctors of divinity: upon which • I told him he was very much miflaken if he
at the fight of that harmless creature. My friend Mrs. Lucy, her maid, having a greater respect for me and my purse than he had for " my rival, always took care to pin the tail of a cat under the gown of her miftrefs, whenever 'fhe knew of his coming; which had fuch an effect, that every time he entered the room, he looked more like one of the figures in Mrs. Salmon's wax-work, than a defirable lover. In fhort, he grew fick of her company; which the young lady taking notice of, (who no more 'knew why, than he did) the fent me a challenge to meet her in Lincoln's-Inn chapel, which I joyfully accepted, and have, amongst other pleafures, the fatisfaction of being praifed by her for my stratagem. I am, &c. From the Hoop. Tom Nimble.
fuch tedious drudgeries in needlework as were fit only for the Hilpa's and the Nilpa's that lived before the flood. Here is a stir indeed with your hiftories in embroidery, your groves with fhades of filk and ftreams of mohair? I would have you to know, that I hope to kill a hundred lovers before the best housewife in England can ftitch out a battle, and do not fear but to provide boys and girls much fafter than your difciples can embroider them. I love birds and beafts as well as you, but am content to fancy them when they are really made. 'What do you think of gilt leather for furniture? There is your pretty hangings for a chamber; and what is more, our own country is the only place in Europe where work of that kind is tolerably done. Without minding your mufty leffons, I am this minute going to Paul's Church-yard to befpeak a fkreen and a set of hangings; and am refolved to encourage the manufacture of my country. Yours, • Cleora.
of immortality, and teaching us a contempt of that little fhowy grandeur, wherein the Jews made the glory of their Meffiah to confift!
'Nothing,' fays Longinus,can be great, the contempt of which is great.' The poffeffion of wealth and riches cannot give a man a title to greatnefs, because it is looked upon as a greatnefs of mind, to contemn thefe gifts of fortune, and to be above the defire of them. I have therefore been inclined to think, that there are greater men who lie concealed among the fpecies, than those who came out, and draw upon themfelves the eyes. and admiration of mankind. Virgil would never have been heard of, had not his domeftic misfortunes driven him out of his obfcurity, and brought him to Rome.
HAVE often wondered that the Jews fhould contrive fuch worthlefs greatnefs for the deliverer whom they expected, as to drefs him up in external pomp and pageantry, and represent him to their imagination, as making havock amongst his creatures, and acted with the poor ambition of a Cæfar or an Alexander. How much more illuftrious does he appear in his real character, when confidered as the author of univerfal benevolence among men, as refining our paffions, exalting our nature, giving us vatt ideas
If we fuppofe that there are fpirits or angels, who look into the ways of men, as it is highly probably there are, both from reafon and revelation; how different are the notions which they
form of one another? Were they to give us in their catalogue of fuch worthies as are now living, how different would it be from that which any of our own fpecies would draw up?
We are dazzled with the fplendor of titles, the oftentation of learning, the noife of victories: they, on the contrary, fee the philofopher in the cottage, who poffeffes his foul in patience and thankfulness, under the preffures of what little minds call poverty and diftrefs. They do not look for great men at the head of armies, or among the pomps of a court, but often find them out in fhades and folitudes, in the private walks and by-paths of life. The evening's walk of a wife man is more illuftrious in their fight, than the march of a general at the head of a hundred thousand men. Contemplation of God's works; a voluntary act of juftice to our own detriment; a generous concern for the good of mankind; tears that are fhed in filence for the mifery of others; a private defire or refentment broken and fubbued; in fhort an unfeigned exercife of humility or any other virtue; are fuch actions as are glorious in their fight and denominate men great and reputable. The most famous among us are often looked upon with pity, with contempt, or with indignation; while those who are moft obfcure among their own fpecies, are regarded with love, with approbation, and esteem.
The moral of the prefent fpeculation amounts to this, that we fhould not be led away by the cenfures and applaufes of men, but confider the figure that every perfon will make, at that time when wifdom fhall be juftified of her children, and nothing pafs for great or illuftrious, which is not an ornament and perfection to human
The ftory of Gyges, the rich Lydian monarch, is a memorable inftance to our prefent purpose. The oracle being afked by Gyges, who was the happieft man, replied Aglaüs. Gyges who expected to have heard himself named on this occafion, was much furprised, and very curious After to know who this Aglaus fhould be. much enquiry he was found to be an obfcure countryman, who employed all his time in cultivating a garden, and a few acres of land about his houfe.
Cowley's agreeable relation of this story fhall clofe this day's fpeculation.
Thus Aglais (a man unknown to men, But the gods knew, and therefore lov'd him, then)
Thus liv'd obfcurely then without a name,
Sce'ft thou a man that happier is than I? The god, who scorn'd to flatter man, reply'd Aglaüs happier is. But Gyges cry'd, In a proud rage, who can that Aglaus be? 'We've heard as yet of no fuch king as he. And true it was, through the whole earth ' around,
No king of fuch a name was to be found.
Who his high race does from the gods derive?
• After long fearch, and vain enquiries past, In an obfcure Arcadian vale at laft,
(Th' Arcadian life has always fhady been) Near Sopho's town, which he but once had < feen,
This Aglaüs, who monarchs envy drew,
No 611. MONDAY, OCTOBER 25.
Perfidious man! thy parent was a rock, And fierce Hircanian tigers gave thee fuck.
AM willing to poftpone every thing, to do
women. After he had deluded me from my parents, who were people of very good fashion, < in less than three months he left me. My pa· rents would not fee, nor hear from me; and had it not been for a fervant, who had lived in
our family, I must certainly have perished for " want of bread. However, it pleafed Provi'dence, in a very short time, to alter my miferable condition. A gentleman faw me, liked me, and married me. My parents were reconciled; and I might be as happy in the change of my condition, as I was before miferable, but for fome things, that you fhall know, which are infupportable to me; and I am fure you have fo much honour and compaffion as to let thofe perfons know, in fome of your papers, how much they are in the wrong. I have been 'married near five years, and do not know that
in all that time I ever went abroad without my husband's leave and approbation. I am obliged, through the importunities of several ' of my relations, to go abroad oftner than fuits
my temper. Then it is, 1 labour under infup'portable agonies. That man, or rather monfter, haunts every place I go to. Bafe villain! by reafon I will not admit his naufeous wicked 'vifits and appointments, he strives all the ways he can to ruin me. He left me deftitute of 'friend or money, nor ever thought me worth
enquiring after, until he unfortunately happened to fee me in a front-box, sparkling with jewels. Then his paffion returned. Then the hypocrite pretended to be a penitent. Then he practifed all thofe arts that helped before to undo me. I am not to be deceived a fecond time by him. I hate and abhor his odious paffion; and as he plainly perceives it, either out of fpite or diverfion, he makes it his bufinefs to expose me. I never fail feeing him in all public company, where he is always mott industriously spiteful. He hath, in short, told 'all his acquaintance of our unhappy affair they tell theirs; fo that it is no fecret among his companions, which are numerous. They, to whom he tells it, think they have a title to be very familiar. If they bow to me, and I out of good manners return it, then I am pef-.. able to myself or company. tered with freedoms that are no ways agreeIf I turn my eyes from them, or feem difpleased, they four upon it, and whisper the next perfon; he his next; until I have at lat the eyes of the whole com
fortunate. Accordingly I have caufed the following letter to be inferted in my paper the moment that it came to my hands, without altering one title in an account which the lady relates fo handfomely herself.
• Mr. Speciator, FLATTER
you will not
but, if poffible, redre's a misfortune myfelf and feveral others of my fex lie under. I hope you will not be offended; nor think I mean by this to justify my own imprudent conduct, or expect you thould. No! I am fenfible how feverely, in fome of your former papers, you have reproved perfons guilty of the like miimanagements. I was fcarce fixteen, and I may fay without vanity, handfome, when court. ed by a falfe perjured man; who, upon prom se of marriage, rendered me the most unhappy of
pany upon me. Nay, they report abominable falfhoods, under that mistaken notion, "She "that will grant favours to one man, will to a "hundred." I beg you will let thofe who are guilty, know, how ungenerous this way of proceeding is. I am fure he will know himfelf the perfon aimed at, and perhaps put a stop to the infolence of others. Curied is the fate of unhappy women! that men may boaft and glory in thofe things, that we think with mhame and horror! You have the art of
making fuch odious customs appear deteftable. For my fake, and I am fure, for the fake of several others, who dare not own it, but like < me, lie under the fame misfortunes, make it 6 as infamous for a man to boaft of favours, or expofe our fex, as it is to take the lye or a box
on the ear, and not refent it.
Your conftant reader,
• Leftia.' P. S.
· P. S. I am the more impatient under this to him in the following manner:
I entirely agree with the amiable and unfortunate Lesbia, that an infult upon a woman in her circumftances is as infamous in a man, as a tame behaviour when the lye or a buffet is given; I which truth I fhall beg leave of her to illuftrate by the following obfervation.
It is a mark of cowardice paffively to forbear resenting an affront, the refenting of which would lead a man into danger; it is no lefs a fign of cowardice to affront a creature, that hath not power to avenge itfelf. Whatever name therefore this ungenerous man may beftow on the helpless lady he hath injured, I shall not fcruple to give him in return for it, the appellation of
Not many years ago an English gentleman, who in a rencounter by night in the streets of Madrid had the misfortune to kill his man, fled into a church-porch for fanctuary. Leaning against the door, he was furprised to find it open, and a glimmering light in the church. He had the courage to advance towards the light; but was terribly startled at the fight of a woman in white who afcended from a grave with a bloody knife in her hand. The phantom marched vp to him, and asked him what he did there. He told her the truth, without referve, believing that he had met a ghost: upon which fhe spoke
"thou art in my power: ain murderer as ❝thou art. Know then, that I am a nu of a "noble family. A bafe perjured man undid me, and boafted of it. I foon had him dif"patched; but not content with the murder,
have bribed the fexton to let me enter his grave, and have now plucked out his falte heart from his body; and thus I ufe a traitor's "heart." At thefe words the tore it in pieces and trampled it under her feet.
N° 612. WEDNESDAY, OCT. 27.
Murranum bic, atavis & avorum antiqua fonantem
A man, that can so far defcend from his dig-
A generous mind, however enraged against
Leaving my fair correfpondent to the direction of her own wifdom and modefty; and her enemy, and his mean accomplices, to the compunction of their own hearts; I fhall conclude this paper with a memorable inftance of revenge, taken by a Spanish lady upon a guilty lover, which may ferve to fhew what violent effects are wrought by the most tender paffion, when foured into hatred; and may deter the young and unwary from unlawful love. The ftory, however romantic it may appear, I have heard affirmed for a truth.
VIRG. Æn. 12. ver. 329.
is highly laudable to pay respect to men who are defcended from worthy ancesters, not only out of gratitude to thofe who have done good to mankind, but as it is an encouragement to others to follow their example. But this is an honour to be received, not demanded, by the defcendants of great men; and they who are apt to remind us of their ancestors, only put us upon making comparisons to their own disadvantage. There is fome pretence for boating of wit, beauty, ftrength or wealth, because the commuothers; but we can have no merit, nor ought we nication of them may give pleasure or profit to to claim any refpect, because our fathers acted well, whether we would or no.
mentioned, in a new, and I think, not disagreeThe following letter ridicules the folly I have able light.
• Mr. Spectator,
W preferved, there would probably be no
man valued or defpifed on account of his birth. There is fcarce a beggar in the streets, who would not find himself lineally defcended from fome great man; nor any one of the highest title, who would not difcover feveral bafe and indigent perfons among his ancestors. It would be a pleasant entertainment to fee one pedigree of men appear together, under the fame characters they bore when they acted their refpective parts among the living. Sup'pose therefore a gentleman, full of his illuftri
ous family, fhould, in the fame manner Virgil makes Æneas look over his defcendants, fee the whole line of his progenitors pass in a review before his eyes, with how many varying paffions would he behold fhepherds and foldi6 ers, ftatefmen and artificers, princes and beggars, walk in the proceffion of five thousand years! How would his heart fink or flutter at the feveral fports of fortune in a scene so diverfified with rags and purple, handicraft tools and fceptres, enfigns of diginty and emblems of difgrace; and how would his fears and apprehentions, his tranfports and mortifications, fucceed one another, as the line of his genea logy appeared bright or obfcure?