ture. Homer, however, in his characters of Vulcan and Therfites, in his ftory of Mars and Venus, in his behaviour of Irus, and in other paffages, has been obferved to have lapfed into the buricfque character and to have departed from that ferious air which feems effential to the magnificence of an epic poem. I remember but one laugh in the whole neid, which rifes in the fifth book, upon Monotes, where he is reprefented as thrown overboard, and drying himself upon a rock. But this piece of mirth is fo well timed, that the fevereft critic can have nothing to fay against it; for it is in the book of games and diverfions, where the reader's mind may be supposed to be fufficiently relaxed for fuch an entertainment. The only piece of pleafantry in Paradife Loft, is where the evil fpirits are defcribed as rallying the angels upon the success of their new-invented artillery. This paffage I look npon to be the most exceptionable in the whole poem, as being nothing else but a string of puns, and thofe too very indifferent ones.

↓

-Satan beheld their plight,

And to his mates thus in derifion call'd.

-i

O friends, why come not on those victors proud! Ere-while they fierce were coming, and when we To entertain them fair with open front, And breaft, (what could we more?) propound

・of compong terms

ftraight they chang'd their minds, Flew off, and into ftrange vágaries fell As they would dance: yet for a dance they

feem'd

N° 280. MONDAY, JANUARY 21.
Principibus placuiffe viris non ultima laus eft.
Hor. Ep. 17. lib. 1. ver. 35.
To please the great is not the smallest praife.

TH

CREECH. HE defire of pleafing makes a man agreeable or unwelcome to thofe with whom he converfes, according to the motive from which that inclination appears to flow. If your concern for pleafing others arifes from innate benevolence, it never fails of fuccefs: if from a vanity to excel, its difappointment is no lefs certain. What we call an agreeable man, is he who is endowed with the natural bent to do acceptable things from a delight he takes in them merely as fuch; and the affectation of that character is what conftitutes a fop. Under thefe

leaders one may draw up all thofe who make any manner of figure, except in dumb fhow. A rational and felect converfation is composed of perfons, who have the talents of pleafing with delicacy of fentiments flowing from habitual chastity of thought; but mixed company is frequently made up of pretenders to mirth, and is ufually peftered with constrained, obscene and painful witticisms. Now and then you meet with a man, fo exactly formed for pleafing, that it is no matter what he is doing or faying, that is to fay, that there need no manner of importance in it, to make him gain upon every body who hears or beholds him. This felicity is not the gift of nature only, but must be attended with happy circumftances, which add a dignity to the familiar behaviour which distinguishes him whom we call an agreeable man. It is from this that every body loves and efteems Polycarpus. He is in the vigor of his age and the gaiety of life, but has paffed through very confpicuous fcenes in it; though no foldier, he has fhared the danger, and acted with great gallantry and generofity on a decifive day of battle. To have thofe qualities which only make other men confpicuous in the world as it were fupernumerary to him, is a circumstance which gives weight to his most indifferent ac tions; for as a known credit is ready cash to a trader, fo is acknowledged merit immediate diftinction, and ferves in the place of equipage to a gentleman. This renders Polycarpus grace. ful in mirth, important in business, and regarded with love, in every ordinary occurrence. But not to dwell upon characters which have fuch particular recommendations to our hearts, let us turn our thought rather to the methods of pleafing which muft carry men through the world who cannot pretend to fuch advantages. Falling in with the particular humour or manner of one above you, abftracted from the general rules of good behaviour, is a life of a flave. A parafite differs in nothing from the meanest fervant, but that the footman hires himfelf for bodily labour, fubjected to go and come at the will of his mafter, but the other gives up his very foul: he is proftituted to fpeak, and profeffes to think after the mode of him whom he courts. This fervitude to a pa tron, in an honeft nature, would be more grievous than that of wearing his livery; therefore we will speak of thofe methods only, which are worthy and ingenuous.

The happy talent of pleasing either those abovę you or below you, feems to be wholly owing to the opinion they have of your fincerity. This quality is to attend the agreeable man in all the actions of his life; and I think there need is what forces the approbation even of your opno more be faid in honour of it, than that it ponents. The guilty man has an honour for the judge who with juftice pronounces against him the fentence of death itfelf. The author of the fentence at the head of this paper, was an excellent judge of human life, and paffed his own in company the most agreeable that ever was in the world. Auguftus lived amongst

his friends as if he had his fortune to make in his own court: candour and affability, accompanied with as much power as ever mortal was vefted with, were what made him in the utmost manner agreeable among a fet of admirable men, who had thoughts too high for ambition,

talents and qualifications, as they contributed to advance the pleafures and fentiments of the

company.

Cunning people, hypocrites, all who are but half virtuous, or half wife, are incapable of bong the refined pleasure of fuch an equal

pany as could wholly exclude the regard of 15rtune in their converfations. Horace, in the difcourfe from whence I take the hint of the prefent fpeculation, lays down excellent rules for conduct in converfation with men of pow er; but he speaks it with an air of one who had no need of fuch an application for any thing which related to himself. It fhews he understood what it was to be a skilful courtier, by just admonitions against importunity, and fhewing how forcible it was to speak modeftly of your own wants. There is indeed fomething fo fhameless in taking all opportunities to speak of your own affairs, that he who is guilty of it towards him on whom he depends, fares like the beggar, who expofes his fores, which instead of moving compaffion makes the man he begs of turn away from the object.

N° 281. TUESDAY, JANUARY 22. Pecoribus inbians fpirantia confulit exta. Virg. Æn. 4. ver. 64. Anxious the reeking entrails he confults. AVING already given an account of the diffection of a beau's Head, with the feveral difcoveries made on that occafion; I fhall here, according to my promife, enter upon the diffection of a coquette's heart, and communicate to the public fuch particularities as we obferved in that curious piece of anatomy.

I cannot tell what is become of him, but I remember about fixteen years ago an honest fellow, who fo justly understood how disagreeable the mention or appearance of his wants would make him, that I have often reflected upon him as a counterpart of Irus, whom I have formerly mentioned. This man, whom I have miffed for fome years in my walks, and have heard was fome way employed about the army, made it a maxim, that good wigs, delicate linen, and a chearful air, were to a poor dependent the fame that working tools are to a poor artificer. It was no fmall entertainment to me, who knew his circumstances, to fee him who had fafted two days, attribute the thinnefs they told him of, to the violence of fome gallantries he had lately been guilty of. The skilful

diffembler carried this on with the utmoft addrefs and if any fufpected his affairs were narrow, it was attributed to indulging himself in fome fashionable vice rather than an irreproachable poverty, which faved his credit with thofe on whom he depended.

The main art is to be as little troublesome as you can, and make all you hope for come rather as a favour from your patron than claim from you. But I am here prating of what is the method of pleafing fo as to fucceed in the world, when there are crowds who have, in city, town, court, and country, arrived at confiderable acquifitions, and yet feem incapable of acting in any conftant tenor of life, but have gone on from one fuccefsful error to another; therefore I think I may fhorten this inquiry after the method of pleafing; and as the old Leau faid to his fon, once for all, "Pray, Jack, be a "fine gentleman," fo may I, to my reader, abridge my inftructions, and finish the art of pleafing, in a word, "Be rich 'T

I should perhaps have waved this undertaking, had not I been put in mind of my promife by feveral of my unknown correfpondents, who are very importunate with me to make an example of the coquette, as I have already done of the beau. It is therefore in compliance with the request of friends, that I have looked over the minutes of my former dream, in order to give the public an exact relation of it, which I fhall enter upon without farther preface.

Our operator, before he engaged in this vifionary diffection, told us, that there was nothing in his art more difficult than to lay open the heart of a coquette, by reafon of the many labyrinths and receffes which are to be found in it, and which do not appear in the heart of any other animal.

He defired us first of all to obferve the pericardium, or outward cafe of the heart, which we did very attentively; and by the help of our glaffes difcerned in it millions of little fcars, which feemed to have been occafioned by the points of innumerable darts and arrows, that from time to time had glanced upon the outward coat though we could not difcover the smallest orifice, by which any of them had entered and pierced the inward substance.

Every fmatterer in anatomy knows that this pericardium, or cafe of the heart, contains in it a thin reddish liquor, fuppofed to be bred from the vapours which exhale out of the heart, and being stopped here, are condensed into this watery fubitance. Upon examining this liquor, we found that it had in it all the qualities of that fpirit which is made ufe of in the thermometer, to fhew the change of weather.

Nor muft I here omit an experiment one of the company affured us he himself had made with this liquor, which he found in great quantity about the heart of a coquette whom he had formerly diffected. He affirmed to us, that he had actually inclofed it in a small tube made after the manner of a weather-glafs; but that inftead of acquainting him with the variations of the atmosphere, it fhewed him the qualities of thofe perfons who entered the room where it ftood. He affirmed alfo, that it rofe at the approach of a plume of feathers, an embroidered coat, or a pair of fringed gloves; and that it fell as foon as an ill-fhaped periwig, a clumfy pair of fhoes, or an unfashionable coat came into his houfe: nay, he proceeded so far as to affure us, that upon his laughing aloud when he food by it, the liquor mounted very fenfibly, and immediately funk again upon his looking serious. In short, he told us, that he knew very well by this invention whenever he had a man of fenfe or a coxcomb in his room.

in common prudence, to fear foul play from an indigent perfon, rather than from one whofe circumstances seem to have placed him above the bare temptation of money.

This reafon alfo makes the common wealth regard her richeft fubjects, as thofe who are most concerned for her quiet and intereft, and confequently fitteft to be intrufted with her higheft enjoyments. On the contrary, Catiline's faying to thofe men of defperate fortunes, who applied themfelves to him, and of whom he afterwards composed his army, that "they had nothing to hope for but a civil war," was too true not to make the impreffions he defired.

3

I believe I need not fear but that what I have

faid in praife of money, will be more than fufficient with most of my readers to excufe the subject of my prefent paper, which I intend as an effay on the ways to raife a man's fortune, "or the art of growing rich.".

The first and most infallible method towards the attaining of this end is thrift: all men are not equally qualified for getting money, but it is in the power of every one alike to practife this virtue; and I believe there are very few perfons, who, if they pleafe to reflect on their paft lives, will not find that had they faved all thofe little fums which they have spent unneceffarily, they might at prefent have been mafters of a competent fortune. Diligence juftly claims the next place to thrift: I find both thefe excellently well recommended to common ufe in the three following Italian proverbs.

gaged replied, That his whole art confifted in doing one thing at once. If, fays he, I have any neceffary difpatches to make, think of nothing elfe until thofe are finifhed; if any domeftic affairs require my attention, I give myfelf up wholly to them until they are fet in order.

Though the ways of getting money were long fince very numerous, and though fo many new ones have been found out of late years, there is certainly ftill remaining fo large a field for inven-' tion, that a man of an indifferent head might eafily fit down and draw up such a plan for the conduct and fupport of his life, as was never yet once thought of.

We daily fee methods put in practice by hungry and ingenious men, which demonftrate the power of invention in this particular.

It is reported of Scaramouche, the first fa-` mous Italian comedian, that being at Paris and in great want, he bethought himself of conftantly plying near the door of a noted perfumer in that city, and when any one came out who had been buying fnuff, never failed to defire a taste of them when he had by this means got together a quantity made up of feveral different forts, he fold it again at a lower rate to the fame perfumer, who finding out the trick, called it “ Tabac de mille fleurs, or "fnuff of a thoufand flowers." The story farther tells us, that by this means he got a very comfortable fubfiftence, until making too much hate to grow rich, he one day took fuch an unreafonable pinch out of the box of a Swifs officer, as engaged him in a quarrel, and obliged him to quit this ingenious way of life.

Nor can I in this place omit doing juftice to a youth of my own country, who, though he is fcarce yet twelve years old, has with great industry and application attained to the art of beating the grenad er's march on his chin. I am credibly informed that by this means he does not only maintain himself and his mother, but that he is laying up money every day, with a defign, if the war continues, to purchase a drum at least, if not a pair of colours.

I fhall conclude thefe inftances with the device of the famous Rabelais, when he was at a great distance from Paris, and without money to bear his expences thither. This ingenious author being thus fharp fet, got together a convenient quantity of brick-duft, and having difpofed of it in different papers, writ upon one," poifon, for Monfieur," upon a fecond, "poifon for the Dauphin,' and on a third, "poifon for the King." Having made this provifion for the royal family of France, he laid his papers fo that his landlord, who was an inquifitive man, and a good fubject, might get a fight of them.

The plot fuccceded as he defired: the hoft gave immediate intelligence to the fecretary of ftate. The fecretary presently fent down a special meffenger, who brought up the traitor to court, and provided him at the King's expence with proper accommodations on the road. foon as he appeared, he was known to be the celebrated Rabelais, and his powder upon examination being found very innocent, the jeft was only laughed at; for which a lefs eminent droll would have been fent to the gallies.

As

Trade and commerce might doubtless be ftill varied a thousand ways, out of which would arife fuch branches as have not yet been touched. The famous Doily is ftill fresh in every one's memory, who raifed a fortune by finding out materials