CANTO II.

CONJURATIONS!

ARGUMENT.

THE Bard proceeds like one that's striving
To practise Arnall's (e) art of diving;
Presents sublime and strange narrations
Of wizards, ghosts, and conjurations;
Next tours in Della Cruscan stile
Above old Homer, half a mile;
And flutters round in airy region,
Just like a wild-goose or a pigeon;
Fir'd with the theme of Haygarth's praises
Until his rapture fairly blazes:
Then in a duel shews more prowess,
Than Vandal that e'er was, or now is.

Now I'm a man so meek and humble,
I don't allow myself to grumble,
Am loth your patience thus to batter,
But starving is a serious matter! 41

41 But starving is a serious matter! Many a worthy London Alderman will most feelingly sigh a dolorous response to this pathetic complaint.

Another reason too, may't please ye,
Why thus I dare presunie to tease ye;
If you my wrongs should not redress,
We all must be in one sad mess! 42

The credit of our craft is waning,
Then rouse at this my sad complaining;

42 We all must be in one sad mess! The sound is here a most correct echo to the sense; like the

Βη δ'ακεων παρα θινα πολυφλοίσβοιο θαλασσης

of HOMER; the

Quadrupedante putrem sonitu quatit ungula

campum,

of VIRGIL; the

Many a lusty thwack and bang,

of BUTLER;

And ten low words oft creep in one dull line, of POPE, &c. Indeed, gentlemen, I shall almost be tempted to pronounce that person a sorry sort of a simpleton, who does not see, or seem to see, the lengthened visage and hanging lip of our learned Esculapian Fraternity, depicted with the phiz-hitting pencil of a Hogarth, in these eight beautiful and appropriate monosyllables.

For, though my fate now seem the rougher,
Still you as well as I must suffer.

Behold! A rising INSTITUTION, 43 (f)
To spread Perkinean delusion ;
Supported by a set of sturdymen,
Dukes, quakers, doctors, lords, and clergymen!

Unblushing at the knavish trick,

I fear these fellows soon will kick
(A thing of all things most uncivil)
One half our physic to the d-v-l!-

And then, alas! your worships may
Be forc'd to moil the live long day,
With hammer, pickaxe, spade, or shovel,
And nightly tenant some old hovel.

7

43 Behold a rising INSTITUTION.

The builders of this second edition of the Tower of Babel must be confounded; and that they will be, most certainly, provided the measures herein after recommended, be fully and manfully carried into effect.

Or, destitute of food and lodging,
Through dark and dirty lanes be dodging,
Unless t' avoid such dismal lurkings,
You put a powerful paw on PERKINS.

Behold what ought to raise your spleen high,
Perkins supported by Aldini! 44
It niust have been most sad, foul weather,
Front Italy to blow him hither.

My wrath, indeed, is now so keen, I
Ev'n wish, for sake of that Aldini,
This ink were poison for the wizard,
This pen a dagger in his gizzard !

44 Perkins supported by Aldini !

These two wonder-working wizards are said to effect their necromantic manœuvres by the application of the same principle to the animal machine. But the latter does not, in so great a degree, infringe on our privileges, for he begins where we leave off, that is, after the patient is dead; whereas Perkins, by his pretended easy and expeditious mode of curing those who ought, to depend solely on 'Death and the Doctor,' is a more formidable foe to our profession.