"All in that terra incognita of yours as usual, I suppose ?" he inquired. "If you mean to ask if all at home be well, I am happy to reply in the affirmative." "Did the late barbarous carnival," pursued the little man, go off without a broken neck; and how often were the curtains and chimneys set on fire ?" 66 it was, would have "disturbed its propriety." | nalled us to take chairs, and Cupid got a hint The summons for a free entry of the premi- to quit the room. ses seemed rather to be delivered by a member of the fire-brigade than a Christian cabman; and two young females, a boy with books in a leathern strap, a stout gentlewoman-perhaps the proprietrix, and not insured-with Cupid in the back-ground, all and every responded to the summons. One voice begged to know if the fire was next door; and the second was sure it was at the baker's opposite-strong emphasis on the last syllable; the boy with the books laid the venue in the mews behind; and to all these hurried demands but one unsatisfactory answer was returned, and in the Irish manner the question was answered by asking another, "Was Mr. Harden at home ?" 66 Heavily, too, my dear boy, and no mistake," was my consolatory answer, as we followed in the wake of Master Cupid, who ushered us duly to the presence. The little gentleman was snugly ensconced in a huge library-chair, the Kilmarnock cap jauntily dropping its scarlet tassel over his left ear, and in brimstone slippers, as Archy would have expressed it, "his taes were cockit on the fender." His out-o'-the-way features were screwed up into an expression of dignified displeasure. He neither turned the Kilmarnock to the right or the left, not condescending to favor us with the light of his countenance. To the Ethiopian's announcement that Massa Frank and Massa Brian were in his presence, he replied by an inquiry of "What portion of the hall-door had survived the assault?" "No casualty affecting life or limb has occurred; and my father has no claim to make against the County Fire-office that I have heard of." "Marvellous, by my faith!" said the dwarf. "Well, my young swankey!" and he addressed himself to Brian, " have you managed to keep your hands quiet since your arrival ?" and he threw a side-glance at Mr. O'Linn. The question was a puzzler; and Brian appeared doubtful whether to admit or conceal his pleasant passage of arms at the Gloucester coffee-house with Captain Dangerfield. "Are ye deaf? Can't ye speak?" exclaimed he of the brimstone slippers. Still Brian hesitated; but I came to the rescue. "The fact is, my dear sir, as Doctor Pangloss very properly remarks, that on their own merits modest men are dumb,' and, from this national infirmity, my young friend here is rather averse to sound his own trumpet." 66 Humph! would you undertake the task for this bashful Irishman ?" asked the dwarf. "Willingly, sir. We were taking_our ease in our inn, reading the Morning Post, dreaming of no guile, and in love and charity with all men, when an acquaintance of yours wished to favor us with his company; an honor we had bad taste enough to decline. In return, this personage taunted me with "Is it customary in that homicidal land, being a farmer's son, and applied to my called Ireland, and the refugium peccatorum, young friend language still more offensive. ycleped the Border,' when you have busi-As a natural consequence I rose to kick the ness to transact with a man, as a step preliminary, to break into his dwelling-house ?” Really, sir, we are very sorry to have most unintentionally occasioned this confusion; and, for the future, cabmen shall be duly admonished to avoid creating any disturbance, and be obliged to keep the peace.' "Observe the general alarm your onslaught upon the hall-door has caused. That gentle bird," and the dwarf pointed out a malevolent-looking cockatoo, "will probably be unapproachable for a week; and this playful animal," and he directed his long lean finger at a baboon that was sitting on the top of a bookcase, and mowing at us most spitefully, “ may not recover his good temper till to-morrow." fellow out; but in this intended operation Master Brian anticipated me." 66 Well, what followed next?" "As pretty a flush-hit as ever floored a private gentleman on the threshold of a coffee-room." "And you bailed out of the station-house by the landlord," added the little gentleman. Quite in error, my dear sir. We nev er had the pleasure of an introduction to it." “And, what became of the unhappy per Again I expressed regret that the nervous temperament of the little gentleman and his favorites had been discomposed, when he sig-son you assaulted ?" "He retired; and if an under-waiter may supplied with money, and leave of absence be trusted, with as beautiful a black eye as for a week; and with these advantages, and London can produce. I think I may depend on my informant; for, he was an Irishman; and in the quality of that article he should be a connoisseur." "You named twice or thrice this person as a friend of mine ?" "Yes; although when you last met there was rather a difference of opinion between you." "On what point?" said the little fellow. "A very material one. He declared himself alive; and you asserted that he had been gibbetted nine years before in Cuba. The person I allude to, called himself Captain Dangerfield." "Ha! how met you that unmatched scoundrel?" he inquired. "He travelled with us to town; and afterwards was good enough to pay us a morning visit. The rest you know. I can personally prove a clean knock-down-and, as to the kicking out, I depend on the statement of the most active operator in the party." "Strange! strange! strange!" the dwarf muttered between his teeth. "The hand of fate is in it. Humph! Change instantly your hotel; and destroy every clew which could enable Hans Wildman to trace you to another." "Hans Wildman?" we both exclaimed. "Or Jan Dangerfield, or any alias you please. Go; I have business to attend to; and a weekly visit from you both will be sufficient. Return on next Tuesday; that is, if you are then permitted to be at large-a circumstance I have doubts upon-and then the leading objects of your respective lives shall be distinctly pointed out. One word more. Use the money lodged for you at discretion. Hundreds will test the character as much as thousands,--and now, be off!" The little gentleman waved his hand; the cockatoo screamed; the monkey chattered; a bell sounded; Cupid reappeared; and we descended to the hall-door; thus terminating a first visit to our worthy patron. When we flung ourselves into a cab we held communion, en route to the Gloucester, whether we should rebel at once, or knock under to the little gentleman; but, having accepted his money, we resolved that we were bound in honor to submit. According to his earnest injunction, we decided on abandoning Piccadilly; and, after a brief research in the neighborhood of the Strand, we selected lodgings in Craven Street, which, from its central situation, we considered would facilitate our intended investigation of the Modern Babylon. This important affair having been accomplished, we adjourned to a tavern in Covent Garden to dine, and discuss our future operations. Here we were-in rude health, well a little ingenuity, much might be effected in the great metropolis within the time allotted by the dwarf, before we should be required to give him an account of our stewardship. But" love will be the lord of all"-Holmesdale was but three-and-twenty miles from the capital-there his darling Susan lived; and thither, of course, Brian decided on repairing. He departed accordingly, next morning from the Golden Cross; and I was left to work out the stipulated week to the best advantage. In the space of human existence seven days may appear a trifling section; but brief as it was, the character of my future fortunes was correctly ascertained. London is a dangerous place. So said my poor mother; and, upon my soul, the old lady was oracular. I had heard of dangerous localities; been entreated to avoid taking apartments vis-a-vis to a dressmaker; warned against Regent Street between three and five P.M.-and bal-masqués, when tickets were under half-a-crown. There may be peril in the passage of a thoroughfare, and gentlemen "whose hearts are weak" may get into trouble in the parks in the. evening. White Conduit Gardens are esteemed doubly hazardous to inflammable constitutions; and I knew the peace of mind of an Irish gentleman endangered for a fortnight, from executing a polka at Baron Nathan's monthly ball. But of all the confounded localities that ever an unsuspicious borderer adopted, your genteel and quiet street is by far the worst. I unhappily, to this established truth can bear my personal testimony-and which in another chapter the reader will probably admit to be true to the letter. No place on earth is so lonely as a great city when a man is actually alone. I felt it; and while Brian, bound on love's errand, was rooffing the Holmesdale coach, I found myself gazing with deep interest at the first-floor windows of No. 5. What was there in peagreen silk curtains, with yellow draperies, to attract the eye? Nothing. The morning was warm and sunny-one casement was unfolded-on the spider-table in the window stood a cage; and the cage was tenanted by a canary. Well, what was wonderful in all this? Alas! nothing at all; only, that the pretty little canary happened to have a devilish pretty mistress. Whenever a handsome nursemaid is determined to disturb a young gentleman's tranquillity, she's sure to kiss the baby; and, before I had admired the brass cage, and its tiny occupant five minutes, a woman who would induce a Moslem to abandon a heaven full of houris for one smile, approached the pretty prisoner, and commenced a flirtation with him. A hand, exquisitely white, first provoked hostilities; and then rosy lips, and teeth of pearl," demanded an armistice, | It was the third evening-" there's luck in and ratified the renewal of amicable relations odd numbers,"-I determined to make the inwith a kiss. Oh! that I could have trans- tended coup d'essay, and fortune favored migrated; shuffled off this mortal coil, and it. become a canary on the spot! Just then, and In authorship, in the first chapter of a as I gazed upon her with rapturous admira- fashionable novel, when not written to order tion, the fair one's eyes encountered mine. in a regular manufactory, it is said the great She blushed; evinced confusion; and pre- difficulty lies; in war, the nitial movement cipitately retreated, leaving me over head is generally the most ticklish in the camand ears in love, and in a situation which paign; and, in love, I was unhappily a neoJack Falstaff would describe as "past pray-phyte; and, therefore, whether I should ing for." commence with an obscure hint at matriHalf an hour elapsed. I saw a figure mony, or a direct threat of an immediate flit across the carpet of first floor No. 5. It commission of felo-de-se, rather bothered me. was the sweet unknown, now shawled and In this distressing state of uncertainty, a bonneted. She was preparing to walk out. butcher's boy, an emissary direct from Cupid, I caught up my hat and cane. The opposite effected what my modesty prevented me hall-door was opened, and out came the beau- from achieving. Larking with a brother tiful incognita, with a fat Blenheim, secured blackguard, he contrived to pass between the by blue ribbon from the chances of abduction. fat Blenheim and the fair proprietrix; down I followed at a respectful distance; saw her dropped the blue ribbon; the canine favorite cross Spring Gardens, and enter St. James's scuttled off; the lady screamed; and I hurPark. ried to recover the lost favorite, and restore the tranquillity of the pretty owner. Indeed this love chase was but short; for Mignon, at his best pace, could not have accomplished the distance between the Duke's Pillar and Story's Gate under the half-hour. The air, the dress, and the locale of my enslaver-all bespoke the lady, and prohibited any attempt on my part to convey even a distant intimation of my sufferings; and for three mornings and evenings, I worshipped at the shrine I was forbidden to approach. The kisses lavished on the bird, and the caresses with which the corpulent spaniel was favored, were maddening to a man so desperately in love as I; and it had become a question whether I should be able to survive the week-when, lo! the archer-boy listened to my prayers, and relented. Indeed, concealment was no longer supportable; and I had come to the desperate resolution of placing my fortune on a cast, and daring the worst. Two circumstances had decided me on "going the whole hog." The preceding evening I had seen a muffled figure knock at No. 5; and from the occasional appearance of a second shadow, two persons were evidently in the first-floor opposite and no mistake. Of course I was jealous as a Turk, and restless as an unclean spirit. Still, on the next blessed morning I was regularly at my post; and as I superintended the kissing of the canary, a side-long glance met mine. The lips parted playfully; and when at this unexpected condescension I endeavored to telegraph the extent of my misery across the street, her eye met mine, and "yet she chid not." "What will not woman when she loves ?" says Sam Rogers; and surely man in that unhappy condition should not sport white feather. The afternoon was particularly fine; nursemaids pointed out the beauty of the Serpentine to tall gentlemen in shell-jackets, while the half-score juvenile cockneys sent into the Park, for the benefit of fresh air and good example under their especial tutelage, were flinging crumbled bread to the barnacles. This feat of activity on my part was graciously approved, and the lady blushed her thanks. Break the ice once, and it is astonishing how matters progress afterwards. An hour's walk,- -a short sojourn upon a gardenbench,-a stroll home, and by everything amatory! the introduction was achieved, and permission granted to pop over the street, and make a passing call that evening. Egad! had I been born under an Hibernian planet, my luck could not have been more brilliant. There is sometimes a little delicacy in asking a lady's name; but the beautiful proprietrix of the canary-bird directed me to enquire for Mrs. Bouverie; and, at the earliest hour that fashion would allow, I stepped across the street, and knocked at No. 5. It was promptly opened; and I was conducted to the drawing-room, where I found Mrs. Bouverie, Mignon, and the canary. Really, everything in the apartment was distinguished by good taste. There was bijouterie on the mantel-piece, and knickknackeries on the tables; a rosewood piano was open; and a fashionable ballad stared me in the face. I asked her to sing it; in a moment she consented, and the voice and style in which this murderous canzonet was delivered-completed my destruction. Coffee was introduced by the lady's maid, and we left the piano for the sofa. I never found a person more at ease. Well, that marked high-breeding. I never met a lady more undisguised; and, Lord! how charming in woman is ingenuousness. Without even a hint on my part, the lady treated me with confidence, and unsolicited. sume to inquire who might that evening visitor be?" Without a moment's hesitation she turned her dark eyes on mine, playfully shook her head, and disclosed a well-regulated set of ivory, that a West-end dentist would have sworn by. "Ah! Mr. Elliott! How suspicious you men are," and she tapped my cheek. "1 am half inclined to punish you, and play the mysterious. You are correct in every particular of this evening visit; and the gentleman was—” She paused, and smiled. "Good heaven. What would Mr. Browning say, think, or imagine, if he heard you address me as you do?" "And, who the devil, dearest Caroline, is Mr. Browning?" made me a candid disclosure; and never was a female biography so modestly narrated as her own. Mrs. Bouverie was a widow. Now, I am rather prejudiced against that body generally; but Mrs. Bouverie was one out of a million. Left an early orphan; confided to nurses, nursery-governesses, finishing ditto, and eventually to a most ill-natured guardian, she had been induced by that iniquitous personage, who had possessed himself of heaven knows how many thousands in the three per cents, and, like Alderman Gibbs, was pleased to play the unaccountable, to accept Major-General, who had passed five-and-twenty years in Bombay, and had just returned from the East, with a bad temper, a worse liver, and fifty thousand in East India stock. Of course the sacrifice was awful, and she poor soul! led a dog's life of it, until the old fellow dropped off the hooks, and left her again at liberty. Deliv- "Worse and worse!" she exclaimed laughered from a bilious Major-General, and liber-ingly. "In one sentence, you have regularated e vinculo matrimonii, the fair widow ly arrived at the superlative! To prevent a sang "I may be happy yet," when the infer- still higher flight of the endearing, I must nal old "unaccountable" annihilated every reply at once to your inquiry. Mr. Brownhope of that by popping her into Chancery. ing was, in sooth, the muffled stranger, and India bonds, reduced annuities, consols, car- Mr. Browning is-" riages, plate and jewels, were all for the present placed in abeyance; and she, poor injured one! necessitated to exist upon the paltry pittance of four hundred a-year; which being pin-money, thank God! neither the "unaccountable," nor the keeper of the seals, could place their fingers on. With the composure of a martyr she had submitted to the decree of fate, until she could obtain a similar favor from the Chancellor; gave up a house, No. 197, Marine Parade, Brighton, for a Craven Street first-floor; dropped female society generally, and totally abjured the masculine; lived on her reduced income; could pass Howel and James's without a murmur, and declined instructing Smith and Harding in book-keeping. What were her wants, or those of a faithful maid, a fat Blenheim, and her dear canary? Pshaw! a mere bagatelle! It was true that she had heavier claims upon her purse; she had pensioned a paralytic nurse, and provided for a reduced governess. There was an ingenuous disclosure! ayand to me, a stranger, too. Were we but a little longer acquainted, I felt assured that every thought her bosom harbored would be as artlessly entrusted to me. "But, dearest Mrs. Bouverie. Ah! that I dare call you Caroline! Forgive me when I trespass, and probably what you may fancy too heavily also upon your kindness. Yesterday evening, as I gazed on these dear windows, I observed a stranger closely muffled, knock at the door, and gain immediate admission. Presently, through an opening in the sun-blinds, I saw a man's figure reflected upon the wall. Dare I pre Another arch and mischievous hiatus. "A suitor for this fair hand?" I said, and kissed it. "Oh, no; though not a suitor, he is certainly a solicitor,-not in the court of love; but, alas! in those of Westminster." Damn it! and had my peace of mind been disturbed, and my midnight visions nightmared by the apparition of an attorney-atlaw? Well, a load was removed from my bosom: and he who in fancy I had regarded as a rival was but a legal harpy after all, and belonged to that rascally brigade which the Irish so happily call "the devil's own.” I need scarcely say that the sweet widow's confidence was reciprocated; and, in return, I mentioned generally that I knew nothing of the world; had never been in London in my life; had the task inflicted upon me of circulating a small sum, and implored her to allow me to cultivate a closer acquaintance. Women may be " uncertain, coy, and hard to please," and after all, as Scott says, make excellent nurse-tenders. What a change in my moral temperament this interview had wrought; and Mrs. Bouverie was a jewel above price. I had risen from my virtuous bed in envy, hatred, and uncharitableness and now, when I sought my pillow, to the assertion that "this world's a world of woe," I would have joined issue with Captain Morris, and denied it totally. s; The fourth day dawned. I rose early; breakfasted; and looked out for the canary. Before five minutes had elapsed Mrs. Bouverie appeared with a bit of sugar for the favorite, and a difference of opinion arose with the bird which prevented her from observing that I was an anxious looker-on. Some-intitulated "gentleman" by act of parliament. body declares that "beauty when unadorned Whatever his business was with his fair is adorned the most ;" and, had the assertor client, it was no doubt confidential, for he reseen Mrs. Bouverie en papiliotte, and her quested and obtained a private interview. morning-gown, he would never have hesitat- During a full quarter of an hour, while the ed to confirm the same on corporal oath. conference lasted, I played with the canary, the street-door, and Mrs. Bouverie rejoined me in a few minutes, and made a thousand apologies for her temporary desertion. It appeared, that in law a person was subject to multiplied annoyances; but in chancery, they literally could not call their life their own. We walked, by appointment, in the park; or beat the devil's tattoo upon my boot. At dined, at my urgent desire, at Verey's; re- last the conclave terminated. A mutual turned to Craven Street at twilight; and I" good-night" was bidden. I heard him close insisted on seeing Caroline up stairs. In the absence of her own maid, she of the establishment-an Irish importation indigenous to lodging-houses, and stupid to annoyance, opened the street-door, and gave us free admission. She neither could comprehend the lady, nor, as it afterwards appeared, could the lady comprehend her; and when we were ushered into the drawing-room, there stood a gentleman, apparently quite at home, his face turned to the door, and his back to the fire. The lady started; so did the gentleman; and I was rather puzzled to know wherefore a lady's apartment should have been invaded in her absence with impunity. "This is an unexpected pleasure," said the lady. "I did not expect you to call this evening." "I believe not," was his reply; and I fancied that the tone and manner of the gentleman were intended to convey much more meaning than the words. I fancied that the widow threw a sly shot at me to fish for my opinion of Mr Browning; and I candidly admitted that, to my unsophisticated is of a lawyer, the gentleman's general appearance was opposed. Mrs. Bouverie agreed with me that, although amazingly clever in his profession, Mr. Browning did not look the lawyer at first sight; but even within her brief experience of it, the world had marvellously changed. A servant of-all-work would not now-a-days take in a letter unless a "Miss" preceded the address; nor a green-grocer execute an order transmitted by the penny-post, if an "Esquire" were not annexed to his patronymic. "Allow me," continued the fair owner of I remained another hour; obtained Mrs. the canary, "to present my friend, Mr. Bouverie's consent to drive to Richmond Browing, to Mr. Elliott?" next day, and have an early dinner at the We both bowed ceremoniously; and, as it" Star and Garter." At parting, I ventured struck me, neither of us appeared to exhibit to carry her hand to my lips for the second any particular satisfaction at the introduc- time-crossed over to my own quarters "tartion. I observed the stranger run his eye nation bad" in love-but still wondering that over me from head to foot; and when I in a chancery practitioner should assume the turn examined Mr. Browning's outer man, I blue cloak and hirsute appendages of a light am free to confess, as they politely say in dragoon. Parliament, that the investigation was anything but agreeable. CHAPTER XI. Visit Richmond in company with the Colonel's widow.-What happened at the "Star and Garter," and during the drive home.Brian's journey to. Holmesdale, and the reception he met with there. Heaven pity my Border ignorance! I had formed my ideas of a legal practitioner from old Willy Crookedplea of Alnwick; and thought that, as a matter of course, an attorney must wear a coat in the style of the year one, of dingy brown and most capacious pockets; sit on a high stool; insert the stump of a pen behind his ear, and take Scotch snuff by the ounce. Now Mr. Browning did not answer the description, WHEN I settled myself quietly at my loneHis garments were fashionably cut, and he ly fireside, to blow my cloud in comfort, and sported both mustache and imperial. Willy afterwards luxuriate with my slippers on the Crooked plea wore worsted mittens; Mr. fender over a glass of diluted cognac,-for to Browning encased a diamond-ringed finger these indulgences I lament to say I am given in light lavender. The Alnwick member of late "i' the afternoon," as regularly as the "the devil's own" patronized a pepper-and- the royal Dane was to snoozing in his sumsalt wrap-rascal; the Londoner had adopted mer-house-I thought over the occurrences a blue military cloak, lined with while shalloon, and decorated with a King's order button. Egad! "take him for all in all," Mr. Browning looked a devilish deal liker a light dragoon, than a person skilled in the law and of the evening with mingled feelings of pleasure and distrust. In Mrs. Bouverie's parting there was a suppressed tenderness not altogether to be concealed, and which returned to memory with flattering delight; |