such a dowdy. "Well, well, gossips," added the femme sage, "six months more, and we'll know the worst." Corpora! O'Tool was six feet in his stocking-soles, and the grenadier company of the 18th Royal Irish could not produce a cleaner soldier. For the sins of the village-as the While some moonlit meeting in the church old women avouched-Roger O'Tool select-lane, or a tete-a-tete across a close-clipped ed the "Chequers" for head-quarters, his er- hedge, were quite sufficient to fix public atrand being to obtain a supply of food for pow- tention in Holmesdale for a day or two, the der, to enable his Majesty, God bless him! to simple people little dreamed that aught was support his crown and dignity as it ought to transacting there that could affect anything be. That Roger was a loyal subject and a beyond a village reputation. They knew not faithful servant, might be inferred from his that in the Priory its gloomy lord was devisactivity and success, he having, in the brief ing means to secure his foully-gained inheritspace of three months, induced divers clean-ance; while, at the same moment, a wrongbuilt lads to accept the loan of a shilling ed orphan was listening to a tale which to over-night, and the present of a cockade in strange impulses and doubts before, brought the morning. It was to be regretted that confirmation "strong as holy writ." Roger O'Tool was not more circumspect in his selection of candidates for the "bubble reputation," as more than one aspirant after glory, whom the gallant corporal despatched to "the tented field," should have, according to promise, at the temple of Hymen, made honorable reparation for broken vows. In recruiting instructions, I believe, the candidate for a musket is not obliged to produce testimonials touching his former life and conversation; nor will he even be required to give his subscription to the thirty-nine articles, provided he swear obedience to the articles of war. Corporal O'Tool made no enquiry into private morals, nor cared a brass button if a recruit had been thrice called in the parish church, provided he turned standard height, and satisfied the doctor. Well, if Roger-God forgive him!-now and then induced false youths to play perfidious, he was, after all, only laboring in his vocation; but in his beating orders, was he directed to drink tea with the smith's wife, when her husband had a sick-horse-call up the country? and when he made love to Bessy Brown on the honor of a gentleman, why did he not behave as such? No wonder that popular astonishment was great, when, instead of departing with a placens uxor at his side, in the person of any one of half a dozen young ladies, to whom from time to time he had tendered his hand and fortune, he, Roger, was seen on the box of the Express, cheek by jowl with Wat Whipwell, and lilting like a thrush "I'm over young to marry yet." It was agreed nein. con. in the parlor of the "Chequers," the evening he had cut his stick, that Corporal O'Tool might be an excellent soldier, but that he was a very indifferent example for youth; while the old women, in a private coterie, enumerated such delinquencies as had come to light. There could be no doubt that Roger had committed grievous damage during his short stay; they hoped, rather than expected, that the extent of his offendings was ascertained. Mary Grey looked shocking ill; and Polly Wright, who had hitherto been a shapely girl, had become My dear young friend," said Dr. Faunce, addressing his guest, "I feel towards you a sort of freemasonry-an order which I have the honor to belong to which leads me to forget that we formed an accidental acquaintance on the top of a stage-coach, only four days ago. To strangers I am not very communicative; but in that light, a secret impulse tells me you are not to be considered. I will not give you partial information; and when you have heard my tale, you will admit that in you, I have placed confidence implicitly." Mr. Faunce took a sip preliminary from his tumbler, and thus commenced A DOCTOR'S REVELATIONS. "It is now five-and-thirty years since my uncle articled me to Dr. Doseum. I was an orphan; but my only relative was a kind one-and, though but a small farmer himself, he determined to give me a liberal profession. Physic then, sir, was not what physic's now. Our pharmacopoeia was, as it ought to be, extensive; and if a practitioner did not write half a sheet of paper-foolscap, of course, preferred-and two-and-twenty ingredients were required to compound the same, the patient was discontented, and the apothecary by no means pleased. The world is going railroad speed to perdition. You have been in my sanctum, my dear sir: 'tis now, alas! a beggarly account of empty boxes,'-my jars are untenanted, and my bottles occupied by colored waters. In my early days, was there a flower of the field from which we did not extract a virtue, and embody it in syrup or in unguent? But now, sir, six deadly poisons, as many active purgatives, with a spatula, graduated measure, and a gallon aquæ pure-all, save the simple element, containable in Polly's basket, is quite sufficient for the medical demands upon a modern chymist, who will undertake to convey within the brief compass of a saltspoon, what Doctor Doseum could not have managed to administer in this tumbler." The unhappy Doctor held the crystal be tween him and the candle, then applied it to his lips, and thus continued: "But, sir, I tire you, and you care not a farthing whether materia medica of iny sanctum would require a Pickford's waggon for its conveyance, or be transportable in a lady's reticule." A shrewder guess Doctor Faunce had never made; for Brian, with ill-suppressed impatience, appeared to listen to a Galenical tirade, when burning to hear disclosures which he fancied all-important to himself. Faunce was an oddity in his way; and little as Brian knew of mankind, he thought it better to leave him to himself." "Doseum died two years after I had completed my apprenticeship, and passed the Surgeon's Hall. By the way, they mistook poor Doseum's case altogether. At the post mortem examination of the-” 66 'Stop, my dear Doctor, for the love of Heaven!" exclaimed the unhappy listener. "If you will have a post mortem, make it mine at once." “Well, I'll come to the point with all despatch, and merely say, that I was considered, for a young man, a safe practitioner. The widow offered me the business, my uncle paid the sum demanded for the same, and here I am, successor to Daniel Doseum, M.D. By the way, it was only an Aberdeen one, and there they'll give a degree to a horse. But I'll tell you a pleasant story about that Brian groaned. "I mean another time;" and Mr. Faunce thus proceeded: "The lord of Holmesdale Manor, to whom the present proprietor-if he be so-succeeded." And alarmed, apparently, at his own indiscretion in thus impugning existing rights, Doctor Faunce looked over his own shoulder in alarm. But it was only Polly and her empty basket that had obtruded on the symposium, to announce that her embassy was successfully completed, and if she had been what her master termed "tousled" on the road, why, the bottles had escaped undamaged. The leach waved his hand as a signal for her departure, and when the door closed, he thus continued his narrative : with a friend's wife; and where did he come to spend the honeymoon but to the Che quers.' I was in the habit then of stepping in for half an hour of an evening, when returning from my night calls, to take a glass of ale in the parlor; and I remember I had just lighted a pipe, when up rattled a postchaise, and out stepped two gentlemen.Without asking a question, they rushed up stairs, and entered the room where Mr. and Mrs. O'Quillaghan-I mean Callaghanwere sitting in connubial felicity. In half a minute there was an uproar, and the landlord ran into the parlor, and begged me, for God's sake, to come up, and, if possible, prevent murder. Before we could mount the stairs, I thought the house would have come down; and when we entered the room, on the sofa a lady was lying dead; Captain O'Callaghan, with his back to the fire, and a red hot poker in his hand; a stout man with black whiskers, and a mahogany box under his arm, confronting the Captain; and a little man, very like a Jew, standing in the farthest corner he could find, as if anxious to keep himself out of mischief. As we entered the apartment, the little man in the corner called out, 'Just what was wanted!—two respectable witnesses to establish the identity of the parties. We'll issue the writ at once, and proceed for criminal con—”” "Issue the devil! exclaimed the man with the mahogany box under his arm. 'I came here not to issue writs, but insist on satisfaction.' "And that you shall have, as soon as we have light to-morrow morning,' returned the man with the poker in his hand. 66 6 "What! wait till morning,' returned he with the box, without drilling a hole through a scoundrel's carcase, who has robbed me of a virtuous wife, the lady at present in a quandary on the sofa there; not I. By the holy Frost!' I'll never forget the oath, the scene made such an impression on me- By the holy Frost! I'll slip half an ounce of lead into ye, before I bless myself going to bed."" Now," observed the Doctor. in his own way, making a running commentary as he proceeded, "you Irish gentlemen hold extraordinary opinions on some subjects. Excuse "I mentioned that the present squire suc- me if I take a liberty,—but I could not comceeded hs uncle.-Ghost of Galen !" and the prehend why a virtuous wife should put in a doctor started-" I wonder whether that gid-week at the' Chequers' with a strange gendy girl gave my verbal directions regarding the lotion for Mrs. Bolter's ankle ?" 66 tleman; nor could I exactly understand that before a man said his prayers at bed-time, it was desirable to commit murder." Tormented as Brian was with the Doctor's prolixity, and anxious to obtain information far more important to himself than a faux pas that occurred twenty years ago at a country inn,-still a duel, or an expected one, had an Irish interest, that restored his temper; and he smiled and requested Mr. Faunce to pro. ceed. "If ye must have it,' observed Captain O'- [ resuscitate-if life still remained-the lady Callaghan, who seemed an obliging gentle- thereon extended, and give her Mr. O'Dowd's man, 'you may as well have it now as to- last respects. I took her hand in mine. If morrow. Have ye tools with ye?' she were dead her departure had been recent, for when I touched her pulse her eyes opened directly. 66 The man with the black whiskers significantly tapped the box under his arm with his fore-finger. Then all we require is light,' said the Captain. Landlord, send a couple of lanterns to the stable-yard.' "Doctor-what the devil do they call ye? are they clear off?' "I started back. In the course of my practice I had never witnessed so rapid a recovery. It was marvellous! a lady ap "But Dick Tubbins was afraid, and raised objections; and that put the man with the ma-parently moribunda, to turn round upon a hogany box out of his senses altogether. regular practitioner, who, acting on the adageforsitan scintilla manet,' was hoping, rather than expecting a feeble throb would respond to the pressure of his finger, and demand 'what the devil they called him?' Oh! tarnation to me,' says he, if we are not accomodated directly, I'll blow up the house at once. Why, you thief of the world!' and he turned upon poor Tubbins like a tiger, 'you that's obliged by law to supply travellers with everything they require for their comfort, to refuse a gentleman who has lost his wife, the loan of two candles and a pitch-present his own master.' fork!' "But what the devil did he mean?" said Brian, as a horrifying thought crossed his mind. "They were not going to fight with pitchforks?" "Not at all; but a most ingenious, contrivance as you will admit when you hear the conclusion. Well, Tubbins was still undecided, when his wife, who was listening at the door,-every woman, in a runaway transaction, will be curious to learn full particulars, you know, burst into the room on hearing the house was about to be blown up, and begged that Dick, on account of the children who were asleep up-stairs, would save their lives, and oblige the gentlemen with what they wanted." "Push on, doctor; never mind what the landlady said." "Well, the black-whiskered man, who had lost a virtuous wife, opened the mahogany box, and produced a case of pistols. Charge for yourself,' says he, as every man has his fancy that way; and, as they both appeared adepts, the business was soon got over. All this time the lady lay insensible. "Doctor,' said the disconsolate husband, if I'm shot, give Biddy O'Dowd my best respects and tell her not to take any trouble about the removal of my remains, but lay me in peace and quietness in the next churchyard, though I die a true Catholic. Don't forget that for it would disturb my repose, if it was thought that I did not adhere steadily to the ould religion,' and so saying, he followed Captain O'Callaghan, who had gone out to the yard to make preliminary arrangements, he being familiar with the localities of the 'Chequers.' “They have adjourned to the yard, madam, with lanterns, pitchforks, pistols, a bargeman, and a gentleman's gentleman, at 166 Blessed be God! They're gone to fight; and a shot or two always puts Dick O'Dowd into the best of temper." "That Mrs. O'Dowd was a virtuous wife could not be questioned, for I had her husband's authority for it; and that she was an affectionate one, I had now good oral proof. Still I thought that a pistol-shot was a queer contrivance to render a gentleman goodhumored. "Is there any hope, madam, that this unhappy business could be reconciled, and your elopement be forgiven?' "I fear not, returned the fair levanter, with a sigh. The last bolt I made with Captain Macnamara, poor dear Dick all but took his oath that if I ventured on another lark of the sort, he would have done with me teetotally." "Here, and in one sentence, I received two pieces of information. This was not bolt number one, it appeared; and the Irish meaning of a lark' is, to carry off a neighbor's wife for a fortnight. "The Lord deliver me,' said I to myself, 'from an Hibernian gentlewoman, when I make up my mind to commit matrimony!'" "Anxious and impatient as Brian naturally was to bring Doctor Faunce to more im portant matters, it was quite idle to attempt it, until the delicate affair of O'Dowd versus O'Callaghan was finally disposed of. "Well," continued the regular practitioner, as he termed himself, "while I was offering my mediation to accommodate lark number two, off went a couple of shots behind the stables, and immediately after there was a shout for medical assistance. I ran down; and found the gay deceiver seated on a shock of straw, and Mr. O'Dowd making affection ate inquiries touching the extent of the injury, which turned out to be a flesh-wound in the thigh. Pat,' said the afflicted husband, address "'Pon my soul!' replied the wounded duellist," it looks bad, I'll admit; but young people will be young people, and it was only a spree, after all. It was but this blessed evening that we made up our minds to write to you to-morrow-Mistress O'Dowd to solicit pardon, and a restitution of conjugal rights, and myself to offer gentlemanly satisfaction, when up ye drove to the door. Arrah! Dick dear! ye don't know half the tender regard that little woman has for ye. She did nothing but cry these three days; and, at the very sight of ye she went off into convulsions. Now that yer honor's satisfied, and you know how affectionate your wife is, let us all be friends, and do you go up and shake hands with Mrs. O'Dowd.' "But Mr. O'Dowd hesitated. "Arrah! Pat, jewel!' said he, 'you know how tender-hearted I am; but, remember, this is not the first time that Biddy kicked over the halter.' "Och! man,' returned he upon the straw, 'she's young, ye know; and every day she gets oulder, the more sense she'll have. Come, Dick, prove yerself both a trump, and a Christian; and, while they're carrying me to bed, go up stairs, and give poor Biddy yer blessing.' And, by St. Patrick! I couldn't stay another day, if you engaged to make a bishop of me.' 666 Nothing wrong, I hope ?' I inquired. "Oh! nothing,' said he. The old story, doctor; a woman at the bottom of it.' "And, whose wife are ye going to run away with now?' "Oh! doctor,' he replied, 'I'm an altered man; and I consider bundling other men's wives away exceedingly improper. No-no, I'm determined never again to invade domestic felicity.' "I tried to persuade him to remain a few days longer; but it was idle; and we shook hands, and parted. I was shaving myself next morning, when, who should rush into my sanctum but Dick Tubbins, looking pale as a ghost. "What's the matter, Dick?' I said. "Yes, last night, without even looking at an item,' returned the landlord of the Chequers.' He "Capital customer!' said I. "A devilish bad one,' says he. 666 666 Why? Has he carried off the spoons?' 'No,' returned Dick. I wish he had. has taken off "What?-who?' I ejaculated. "Against such oratory no tender-hearted gentleman could hold out; and, while Captain O'Callaghan was conveyed to bed, Mr. O'Dowd visited his penitent and attached consort, and proved himself both a trump and a Christian; and, after the wounded lover was dressed, and comfortably settled, Mr. and Mrs. O'Dowd drove off, in restored harmony, and in the same chaise which had brought down the irritated husband. Never did a de- "Mrs. Tubbins, and the barmaid,' and parture from the Chequers' occasion more Dick blubbered like a whipped school-boy.— general satisfaction. Mr. O'Dowd had reco-If he had only left one of them behind, to vered an affectionate wife,-Captain O'Cal- carry on the business. What an inconsidelaghan escaped an action for crim. con.— rate man!'" Mr. Tubbins got rid of a customer, who, if not supplied, upon demand, with everything necessary to effect homicide, threatened to blow up the house,—and I had an interesting "Yes; Mrs. Tubbins came back in a week, case for a young practitioner to try his hand and recommenced business, as if nothing had upon. It is true, that the lawyer at first was occurred; and, about twelvemonths afterheavily disappointed; but when he disco- wards, Julia Brown re-appeared one fine vered that the lady had kicked over the hal- evening by the Express,' with a sweet girl ter before,' doubts and dubitations arose as to in her arms, the very image of its gallant the amount of damages at which a special papa. And now," continued the doctor, jury would estimate the loss of such a regu-" that Irish episode being ended, I come back lar levanter. to what you seem so much more interested in. 6 "And now, my young friend, let me come to the moral of this pleasant story; and, by the blessed memory of Esculapius! I'll go right a-head, and give you all the information you require, without further let, hindrance, or delay. Of all the impatient patients ever "Why, Captain O'Callaghan was the devil!" exclaimed Brian. "Did he return the ladies?" "When I commenced my professional career, the dame Elizabeth Hunsgate was lady of the manor. She had been widowed the year after her marriage with the late lord; and six months after his decease, gave birth sonal attractions, sole mistress of a large estate, a widow at five-and-twenty, many a suitor for her hand and jointured land' might have been expected; but few presented themselves, and those who did make the trial were very unceremoniously dismissed. Mrs. Hunsgate was indeed a singular personage. It is said, and I can well imagine it, that a posthumous child, with very painful reminiscences, still has a sacred tie which seems to connect the living with the dead. To the orphan's mother that feeling was unknown; and almost from the hour of her birth, Emily Hunsgate was entrusted to strangers. to a posthumous daughter. She was a cold, mother's love, she evinced a coldness scarcely proud, imperious woman, one who rejected conceivable. A woman of considerable peradvice, except medical, of course-and would not bear the slightest contradiction. Her marriage had been a mere matter of arrangement; and when she exchanged a name, old as the Conquest, for another, she did so, I firmly believe, rather for genealogical than personal considerations. The lord of the Priory was a goodnatured country gentleman, one who considered that every end of existence was accomplished in hunting twice a week, and extending hospitality to all who were entitled to receive it. A man who rode well to hounds, Mr. Hunsgate considered a companion for a king,—and to the field at large he generally tendered an invitation to dinner. On hunting days, his lady invariably declined appearing in the eating room,-and it was whispered that the squire bore her absence with extraordinary resignation. Habits, and mode of thinking, opposite as the antipodes, a perfect indifference of feeling on both sides, pursuits utterly at variance, these circumstances, I have no doubt, enabled the lord and lady of Holmesdale Priory to preserve the external forms of connubial life; but whether this would have continued much Longer is only a matter of conjecture. "A pleurisy, neglected in the beginning they did not bleed as freely as they should have done,-in four days sent Mr. Hunsgate to his fathers; and in the short will he made, he left his wife as absolute mistress over Holmesdale, as Robinson Crusoe was when he boasted he was master of all he surveyed. If she felt aught for her bereavement, she concealed it well, for every order for celebrating the funeral rites was given with as much coolness as if she were calling for her carriage, and in one fell swoop, hounds, huntsmen, and hunters were abolished. She lived in gloomy isolated dignity,-the park gates were closed against the public; and when she passed them,-probably twice or thrice in the year,-four horses and outriders announced her state, while the carriage was closely blinded, lest a transient gleam of the light of her countenance should fall upon some fortunate villager. "You heard my wife's remark, that she was nurse, and governess, and mother;-and that assertion is literally correct. Under her care, Miss Hunsgate was brought up. It is true that her mother was resident in the house; but beyond a visit to the nursery in infancy, and a more formal one to the schoolroom in childhood, to others the care of educating the orphan heiress was entirely committed. "I must hurry on. Miss Emily approached womanhood, and the dame remained cold, repulsive, and unendearing as ever. Never were two beings so opposite. A gentler temper, a kinder heart, a more generous nature, never marked a character so early as that of Miss Emily. As she grew in years, she became more admired and beloved; and there was not a hind on the estate who would not have flung his coat upon a crossing, and if Emily Hunsgate passed with an unwetted foot, he would have held himself as richly rewarded by her smile. "I must remark here, that the family of Hunsgate had almost lapsed; and, with the exception of the young heiress, the succession would, failing her, have devolved upon one so remote as fourth cousinship. This man had been alienated for years from the family of Holmesdale. He had been bred a lawyer, bore but an indifferent reputation, and even the legitimacy of his birth was considered doubtful. The dame of Holmesdale never condescended to waste a thought upon him; and no man bade fairer to lead a detested career, distract a village during life, and go to the grave with the general consent of all the body politic, than the present Lord of the Manor-him, whom you encountered this evening. "The hour of trial came that matrons dread; and Doctor Doseum was suddenly summoned to the Priory. Throughout a day and night he remained in close attendance and at last, a child was born. The sex was announced by the nurse, with the customary addition of what a beautiful baby it was!- "The retirement in which Mrs. Hunsgate And have I suffered all these pains to pro-lived, the seclusion in which her daughter duce a daughter?' was the brief remark that was educated, the gloomy formal ceremony fell from the lips of this proud and impious woman. "Dame Hunsgate seemed a being of different mould to ordinary mortals. From her birth, she disliked her daughter, and to the gentlest spirit that ever would have won a with which the commonest transactions of every-day life were enacted at the Priory, continued until Miss Emily reached seventeen. From her third year, my wife had resided at the Priory, watched over the health, and superintended the education of its future |