looked upon as an act of emulation to furpass the other. These beginnings of disinclination foon improved into a formality of behaviour, a general coldness, and by natural steps into an irreconcilable hatred. These two rivals for the reputation of beauty, were in their stature, countenance, and mien, so very much alike, that if you were speaking of them in their abfence, the words in which you defcribed the one must give you an idea of the other. They were hardly diftinguishable, you would think, when they were apart, tho' extremely different when together. What made their enmity the more entertaining to all the rest of their sex was, that in detraction from each other neither could fall upon terms which did not hit herself as much as her adversary. Their nights grew restless with meditation of new drefles to outvie each other, and inventing new devices to recal admirers, who observed the charms of the one rather than those of the other on the last meeting. Their colours failed at each other's appearance, flushed with pleasure at the report of a disadvantage, and their countenances withered upon instances of applaufe. The decencies to which women are obliged, made these virgins stifle their resentment fo far as not to break into open violences, while they equally fuffered the torments of a regulated anger. Their mothers, as it is ufual, engaged in the quarrel, and fupported the several pretenfions of the daughters with all that ill-chofen fort of expence which is common with people of plentiful fortunes and mean tafte. The girls preceded their parents like queens of May, in all the gaudy colours imaginable, on every Sunday to church, and were exposed to the examination of the audience for fuperiority of beauty. During this constant struggle it happened, that Phillis one day at public prayers fmote the heart of a gay WestIndian, who appeared in all the colours which can affect an eye that could not diftinguish between being fine and taudry. This American in a fummer-ifland fuit was too shining and too gay to be refifted by Phillis, and too intent upon her charms to be diverted by any of the laboured attractions of Brunetta. Soon after, Brunetta had the mortification to fee her rival disposed of in a wealthy marriage, while the was only addressed to in a manner that that shewed she was the admiration of all men, but the choice of none. Phillis was carried to the habitation of her spouse in Barbadoes: Brunetta had the ill-nature to inquire for her by every opportunity, and bad the misfortune to hear of her being attended by numerous flaves, fanned into flumbers by successive hands of them, and carried from place to place in all the pomp of barbarous magnificence. Brunetta could not endure these repeated advices, but employed all her arts and charms in laying baits for any of condition of the fame ifland, out of a mere ambition to confront her once more before the died. She at last succeeded in her design, and was taken to wife by a gentleman whose estate was contiguous to that of her enemy's husband. It would be endless to enumerate the many occafions on which these irreconcilable beauties laboured to excel each other; but in process of time it happened that a ship put into the ifland configned to a friend of Phillis, who had directions to give her the refufal of all goods for apparel, before Brunetta could be alarmed of their arrival. He did fo, and Phillis was dressed in a few days in a brocade more gorgeous and coftly than had ever before appeared in that latitude. Brunetta languished at the fight, and could by no means come up to the bravery of her antagonist. She communicated her anguish of mind to a faithful friend, who, by an interest in the wife of Phillis's merchant, procured a remnant of the fame filk for Brunetta. Phillis took pains to appear in all public places where she was fure to meet Brunetta; Brunetta was now prepared for the infult, and came to a public ball in a plain black filk mantua, attended by a beautiful negro girl in a petticoat of the fame brocade with which Phillis was attired. This drew the attention of the whole company, upon which the unhappy Phillis swooned away, and was immediately conveyed to her house. As foon as the came to herfelf, the fled from her husband's house, went on board a ship in the road, and is now landed in inconfolable defpair at Plymouth. POSTSCRIPT. After the above melancholy narration, it may perhaps be a relief to the reader to peruse the following expoftulation. 06 ১ To T To Mr. Spectator. • The just Remonftrance of affronted That. HO' I deny not the petition of Mr. Who and Which, yet you should not fuffer them to be rude and to call honest people names: for that bears very hard on fome of those rules of decency, which you are justly famous for establishing. They may find fault, and correct speeches in the fenate and at the bar: but let them try to get themselves so often, and with fo inuch eloquence repeated in a fentence, as a great orator doth frequently introduce me. 66 My Lords!" fays he, "with humble fubmifion, "That that I fay is this that, That, that that gentleman has advanced, is not That that he should have " proved to your Lordships." Let those two queftionary petitioners try to do thus with their Who's and their Whiches. 6 What great advantages was I of to Mr. Dryden in * his Indian Emperor, " You force me ftill to answer you in That," * to furnish out a rhyme to Morat? And what a poor ' figure would Mr. Bayes have made without his Egad ' and all That? How can a judicious man diftinguish one thing from another, without saying, This here, or • That there? And how can a fober man without ufing ' the Expletives of oaths, in which indeed the rakes and ⚫ bullies have a great advantage over others, make a dif' course of any tolerable length, without That is; and * if he be a very grave man indeed, without That is to fay? And how instructive as well as entertaining are * those usual expreffions, in the mouths of great men, * Such things as That, and the like of That. 6 ' I am not against reforming the corruptions of fpeech you mention, and own there are proper seasons for the • introduction of other words befides That; but I fcorn 6 as much to fupply the place of a Who ora Which at every turn, as they are unequal always to fill mine; • and I expect good language and civil treatment, and hope to receive it for the future: That, that I fhall • only add is, that I am, Yours, R INDEX. A BIGAILS (male) in fashion among the Ladies, Number 55. Abfence in converfation, a remarkable instance of it in Will Honeycomb, N. 77. The occafion of this abfence, ibid. and means to conquer it, ibid. The character of an absent man, out of Bruyere, ibid. Acrostick, a piece of false wit, divided into fimple and compound, N. 60. Act of deformity, for the use of the ugly club, N. 17. Advertisements, of an Italian chirurgeon, N. 22. From St. James's Coffee-house, 24. From a Gentlewoman that teaches birds to speak, 36. From another that is a fine flesh-painter, 41. Advice; no order of persons too confiderable to be advised, N. 34. Affectation, a greater enemy to a fine face than the smallpox, N. 33. it deforms beauty, and turns wit into abfurdity, 38. The original of it, ibid. found in the wife man as well as the coxcomb, ib. The way to get clear of it, ib. Age, rendered ridiculous, N. 6. how contemned by the Athenians, and respected by the Spartans, ibid. Alexander the great, wry-necked, 32. Americans, their opinion of fouls, N. 56. exemplified in April (the first of) the merriest day in the year, N. 47... Aretine made all the Princes of Europe his tributaries, N. 23. Arietta, her character, N. 11. her fable of the lion and the man, in answer to the flory of the Ephesian matron, ibid. her ftory of Inkle and Yariko, ibid, Aristotle, his obfervation upon the Iambick verse, N. 31. upon tragedies, 40, 4.2. Arsinoe, the first musical opera on the English stage, N. 18. Avarice, Avarice, the original of it, N. 55. Operates with luxury, Author, the neceffity of his r readers being acquainted B B. a book well Acon, (Sir Francis) his comparifon of Baptift Lully, his prudent management, N. 29. Bawdry, never writ but where there is a dearth of in- Beaver, the haberdasher, a great politician, N. 49. Bell, (Mr.) his ingenious device, N. 28. Biters, their business, N. 47. Blackmore, (Sir Richard) his observation, N. 6. Blanks of society, who, N. 10. Blank verse proper for tragedy, N. 39. Bohours, (Monfieur) a great critick among the Fremb, Ν. 62. Bouts-Rimez, what, N. 60. Breeding, fine breeding diftinguished from good, N. 66. Bruyere, (Monfieur) his character of an absent man, N.77. to a filly play, N. 44. Butts described, N. 47. the qualification of a butt, ib. C. Cfar (Julius) his behaviour put him into a lampoon, N. 23. Caligula, his wish, N. 16. to Catullus, who had Camilla |