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Tim. Thou art proud, Apemantus.
Apem. Of nothing so much, as that I am not like Timon.
Tim. Whither art going?
Apem. To knock out an honest Athenian's brains. Tim. That's a deed thou❜lt die for.
Apem. Right, if doing nothing be death by the law.
Tim. How likest thou this picture, Apemantus ? Apem. The best, for the innocence. Tim. Wrought he not well that painted it? Apem. He wrought better, that made the painter; and yet he's but a filthy piece of work.
Pain. You are a dog.
Apem. Thy mother's of my generation; What's she, if I be a dog?
Tim. Wilt dine with me, Apemantus ?
Tim. An thou should'st, thoud'st anger ladies. Apem. O, they eat lords; so they come by great bellies.
Tim. That's a lascivious apprehension.
Apem. So thou apprehend'st it: Take it for thy labour.
Tim. How dost thou like this jewel, Apemantus ? Apem. Not so well as plain dealing*, which will not cost a man a doit.
Tim. What dost thou think 'tis worth?
Apem. Not worth my thinking.-How now, poet? Poet. How now, philosopher?
Apem. Thou liest.
Poet. Art not one?
Poet. Then I lie not.
Apem. Then thou liest: look in thy last work, where thou hast feigned him a worthy fellow.
Alluding to the proverb: Plain dealing is a jewel, but they who use it die beggars.
Poet. That's not feign'd, he is so.
Apem. Yes, he is worthy of thee, and to pay thee for thy labour: He that loves to be flattered, is worthy o'the flatterer. Heavens, that I were a lord ! Tim. What would'st do then, Apemantus?
Apem. Even as Apemantus does now, hate a lord with my heart.
Tim. What, thyself?
Apem. That I had no angry wit to be a lord.— Art not thou a merchant?
Mer. Ay, Apemantus.
Apem. Traffick confound thee, if the gods will not!
Mer. If traffick do it, the gods do it.
Apem. Traffick's thy god, and thy god confound thee!
Trumpets sound. Enter a Servant.
Tim. What trumpet's that?
'Tis Alcibiades, and Some twenty horse, all of companionship. Tim. Pray, entertain them; give them guide to [Exeunt some Attendants. You must needs dine with me :-Go not you hence, Till I have thank'd you; and, when dinner's done, Show me this piece.—I am joyful of your sights.—
Enter Alcibiades, with his company.
Most welcome, sir !
So, so; there !—
Aches contract, and starve your supple joints!That there should be small love 'mongst these sweet
And all this court'sy! The strain of man's bred out Into baboon and monkey*.
* Man is degenerated; his strain or lineage is worn down into a monkey.
Alcib. Sir, you have saved my longing, and I feed most hungrily on your sight.
Tim. Right welcome, sir: Ere we depart, we'll share a bounteous time In different pleasures. Pray you, let us in. [Exeunt all but Apemantus.
Enter two Lords.
1 Lord. What time a day i'st, Apemantus? Apem. Time to be honest.
1 Lord. That time serves still.
Apem. The most accursed thou, that still omit'st it. 2 Lord. Thou art going to lord Timon's feast. Apem. Ay; to see meat fill knaves, and wine heat
2 Lord. Fare thee well, fare thee well.
Apem. Thou art a fool to bid me farewell twice.' 2 Lord. Why, Apemantus?
Apem. Shouldst have kept one to thyself, for 1 mean to give thee none.
1 Lord. Hang thyself.
Apem. No, I will do nothing at thy bidding ; make thy requests to thy friend.
2 Lord. Away, unpeaceable dog, or I'll spurn
Apem. I will fly, like a dog, the heels of the ass.
1 Lord. He's opposite to humanity. Come, shall we in,
And taste lord Timon's bounty? he outgoes
2 Lord. He pours it out; Plutus, the god of gold,
* Meed here means desert.
† i. e. All the customary returns made in discharge of obligations.
The noblest mind he carries,
1 Lord. That ever govern'd man.
2 Lord. Long may he live in fortunes! Shall we
1 Lord. I'll keep you company.
The same. A room of state in Timon's house.
Hautboys playing loud musick. A great banquet served in; Flavius and others attending; then enter Timon, Alcibiades, Lucius, Lucullus, Sempronius, and other Athenian Senators, with Ventidius, and attendants. Then comes, dropping after all, Apemantus, discontentedly.
Ven. Most honour'd Timon, 't hath pleased the gods remember
My father's age, and call him to long peace.
O, by no means,
Honest Ventidius: you mistake my love;
If our betters play at that game, we must not dare
[They all stand ceremoniously looking on Timon.
Tim. Nay, my lords, ceremony Was but devis'd at first, to set a gloss On faint deeds, hollow welcomes, Recanting goodness, sorry ere 'tis shown; But where there is true friendship, there needs none.
Pray, sit; more welcome are ye to my fortunes,
1 Lord. My lord, we always have confess'd it. Apem. Ho, ho, confess'd it? hang'd it, have you not?
Tim. O, Apemantus !-you are welcome.
You shall not make me welcome:
I come to have thee thrust me out of doors. Tim. Fye, thou art a churl; you have got a humour there
Does not become a man, 'tis much to blame :
Go, let him have a table by himself;
Apem. Let me stay at thine own peril, Timon; I come to observe; I give thee warning on't.
Tim. I take no heed of thee; thou art an Athenian; therefore welcome: I myself would have no power: pr'ythee, let my meat make thee silent. Apem. I scorn thy meat; 'twould choke me, I should
Ne'er flatter thee.-O you gods, what a number
Is the readiest man to kill him: it has been prov'd.
* Anger is a short madness.
The allusion is to a pack of hounds trained to pursuit, by being gratified with the blood of an animal which they kill, and the wonder is, that the animal on which they are feeding, cheers them to the chase.