MARLOW.

Pray, child, answer me one question. What are you, and what may your business in this house be?

Miss HARDCASTLE.

A relation of the family, Sir.

MARLOW.

What, a poor relation?

Miss HARDCASTLE.

Yes, Sir. A poor relation appointed to keep the keys, and to see that the guests want nothing in my power to give them.

MARLOW.

That is, you act as the bar-maid of this inn.

Miss HARDCASTLE.

Inn. O law-What brought that in your head? One of the best families in the county keep an inn! Ha! ha! ha! old Mr. Hardcastle's house an inn!

MARLOW.

Mr. Hardcastle's house! Is this Mr. Hardcastle's house, child?

Miss HARDCASTLE.

Aye, sure. Whose else should it be?

MARLOW.

So then all's out, and I have been damnably imposed on. O, confound my stupid head, I shall be laugh'd at over the whole town. I shall be stuck up in caricatura in all the print-shops. The Dullissimo Maccaroni. To mistake this house of all others for an inn, and my father's old friend for an inn-keeper! What a swaggering puppy must he take me for? What a silly puppy do I find myself? There again, may I be hanged, my dear, but I mistoek you for the bar-maid.

Miss HARDCASTLE.

Dear me! dear me! I'm sure there's nothing in my behaviour to put me upon a level with one of that stamp.

MARLOW.

Nothing, my dear, nothing. But I was in for a list of blunders, and could not help making you a subscriber. My stupidity saw every thing the wrong way. I mistook your assiduity for assurance, and your simplicity for allurement. But its over-This house I no more shew my face in.

Miss HARDCASTLE.

I hope, Sir, I have done nothing to disoblige you. I'm sure I should be sorry to affront any gentleman who has been so polite, and said so many civil things to me. I'm sure I should be sorry (pretending to cry) if he left the family upon my account. I'm sure I should be sorry, people said any thing amiss, since I have no fortune but my character.

MARLOW.

(Aside.) By Heaven, she weeps. This is the first mark oftenderness I ever had from a modest woman, and it touches me. (To her) Excuse me, my lovely girl, you are the only part of the family I leave with reluctance. But to be plain with you, the difference of our birth, fortune and education makes an honourable connection impossible; and I can never harbour a thought of seducing simplicity that trusted in my honour, of bringing ruin upon one, whose only fault was being too lovely.

Miss HARDCASTLE.

(Aside.) Generous man! I now begin to admire him. (To him.) But I am sure my family is as good as Miss Hardcastle's, and though I'm poor, that's no great misfortune to a contented mind, and, until this moment, I never thought that it was bad to want fortune.

MARLOW.

MARLOW.

And why now, my pretty simplicity?

Miss HARDCASTLE.

Because it puts me at a distance from one, that if I had a thousand pounds I would give it all too.

MARLOW.

(Aside.) This simplicity bewitches me, so that if I stay I'm undone. I must make one bold effort, and leave her. (To her) Your partiality in my favour, my dear, touches me most sensibly, and were I to live for myself alone, I could easily fix my choice. But I owe too much to the opinion of the world, too much to the authority of a father, so that I can scarcely speak it-it affects me. Farewell. [Exit.

Miss HARDCASTLE.

I never knew half his merit till now. He shall not g'o, if I have power or art to detain him. I'll still preserve the character in which I stooped to conquer, but will undeceive my papa, who, perhaps, may laugh him out of his resolution.

[Exit.

Enter TONY, Miss NEVILLE.

TONY.

Aye, you may steal for yourselves the next time. I have done my duty. She has got the jewels again, that's a sure thing; but she believes it was all a mistake of the servants.

Miss NEVILLE.

But, my dear cousin, sure you won't forsake us in this distress. If she in the least suspects that I am going off, I shall certainly be locked up, or sent to my aunt Pedigree's, which is ten times

worse.

TONY.

To be sure, aunts of all kinds are damn'd bad things. But what can I do? I have got you a pair of horses that will fly like Whistlejacket, and I'm sure you can't say but I have courted you nicely before her face. Here she comes, we must court a bit or two more, for fear she should suspect us.

[They retire, and seem to fondle.

Enter